Here's to tomorrow...

If I have any blog stalkers out there...stay tuned. Tomorrow I'm gonna go on a mini fun photo shoot. Possibly add a little more to that on Saturday depending on my work hours. I'm going to give everyone a taste of my new life, our life. I'll show you around our town, and my new favorite place at our apartment.

Mum festival is this weekend! I'm hoping to celebrate by adding a mum or to to the festiveness of our home.


Cheers to a day of fun tomorrow!


Stay tuned stalkers, tomorrow will soon be here!

A newlyed, a wife, a student, a pca/nanny, a bestfriend, a sister, a daughter, an aunt...

wow is it exhausting sometimes...

but God has been ever so gracious to me- an amazing job, amazing husband, awesome family, and great friends!

Here's what I've been up to lately:

Lots of dishes, laundry, learning to cook...
Starting back up at school- Pharm this quarter could be the death of me
No Baked- no bake cookies today :) my husband asked what for and I replied - to eat? (is there any other reason to make no bakes?)
Caring for some amazing children
trying to find Beth and God alone time
Some journaling
healing my heart from the loss of my 15 year old, best puppy friend ever
stalking blogs
anticipating seeing our wedding photos this weekend
reflecting on the 19th year of my life
spending time sharing my heart with my long time best friend
get togethers with hubby, whit, ryan, and micah- as hubby endearingly calls them- the hyphens
loving on and cuddling with the ever so sweet Micah Deis!

Here's what's coming up:


visit and I'm sure laughs with Greta- if we're lucky- Eric too (AND PICKING UP PICTURES!!!! :-D lil excited can you tell?)
Celebrating my 20th year
More Pharmacology- Yuck- I mean fun.. :/
A Light in the Darke Concert!! :)
Sis night with my soon to be new movie- Made of Honor!

TO DO:

Get malibu

Get hair colored
Hair extensions
teeth whiting
wear retainer
tan
dress fitting
invite design
set in stone and purchase centerpieces
veil
programs
photo list
music list
vows
flowers

something blue ring resized

wedding band and e ring to osterman

A new perspective and a game of scrabble....

I ABSOLUTELY love Whitney, Ryan, and Nate. There presence touches my life in such a way that just can't really be described. Whitney is my female soul mate, the one that hears it all, and love me in my all. Ryan completely pulls me out of my shoes and into someone elses, and yet builds my spirit all in the same moment. Nate well, provides deep and meaningful conversation about topics previously believed to be nonmeaningfull or purpose less. They manage to be the healthy medicene you need in life just to take the edge off, and this can be absorbed simply by being together.

I'm struggling with a few issues with other people deeply. But Ryan provided that new perspective. And that's still in progress...

I'm praying I'm good enough for this new job. Praying I can give my all, and that all exceeds expectations.

Praying i make the grades. A & P's a struggle, and so is other obligations to be that "role model".

What am I doing??

I dont know what's going on with me. I'm scared. I'm hurting. I've haven't scared myself this bad for almost 5 years. I feel like they are against me, I've set out to please them all. And instead I've pleased none of them, and certainly not myself. I don't know who I am anymore. I don't even know what happiness is. I wish I had that person to turn to, that understands, and doesn't judge me. I feel so lied to. They make me feel like I'm not worth it. If I'd known what I do now I don't know if I would have done it all again. I'm struggling not to settle. But, everyone else's happeness comes before me, and it seems like no ones happy. I never knew it was too much to ask. Its about people being there to support us, to publically proclaim our love and promises for each other. It's not about just letting everyone have a party. Is it so bad to celebrate US for 1 day of our lives? Is that so bad?